Hey friends! I’m so glad you’re here. In case you missed this on Instagram, I shared that I sensed the Lord leading me to write on the topic of victory in Christ for the next good chunk of time, until I’ve said all He’s told me to say. Who knows how long that will be, but I’m hoping for 6 months - year. I’ve known for a number of years now that writing will be a part of my calling in life, and battling for victory in Jesus has been my mess that He is turning into my message. When I was really walking through my season of warfare, the kindness and goodness of God in combination with faithfulness of His servants really provided me so much equipping and encouragement. I’ve read dozens of books, did several Bible studies, listened to every single podcast and teaching I could get my hands on, in addition to my own daily (hourly) time in the Word, which became life to my bones and light to my path. As I was discerning whether this tug on my heart to write on this was from God or not, I wondered what I could add to all the wonderful resources that are already out there. The one thing I didn’t have was a sister that was just a step or two ahead of me on the journey. Someone that had gone through what I was going through, but wasn’t so far from that time in their life that they couldn’t remember what those painful nights are really like. I wanted a sister that could talk to me over coffee, instead of from a stage, that felt like half friend and half coach.
I hope in some small way, through the blessing of the interwebs, I can be that sister to you. I haven’t forgotten the deep confusion that sets in during times of battle. I haven’t forgotten what it’s like to literally stop washing the dishes, fall on my knees, and cry out to God to help me take my thoughts captive and set me free from my tormented mind. I haven’t forgotten the nights I slept with my Bible under my pillow, in case I needed it in the middle of the night, and begging God for some truth to transfer by osmosis to my mind. I haven’t forgotten not really knowing how to explain to friends what’s going on, other than something happened, and now you’re in a daily all-out war to live in peace. I haven’t forgotten what it’s like waking up to be with God at 5:15, because you might actually fall apart if you cannot get some time alone with him. I know what it’s like the be the one who’s texting all the friends for prayer again. I could come up with a million more scenarios, but trust me when I say I have been there. Though it all.
I also know what it’s like to see clearly again when the battle is over. I know the taste of sweet victory. I know what it’s like not just to read that it is for freedom that Christ set me free (Galatians 5:1) but to actually feel free. I know what it’s like to live in peace, to miss a quiet time and actually be okay if it happens in the evening instead of the morning. I know what it’s like have the theology of freedom and victory also be my daily, ongoing, consistent reality. I know what it's like to be able to breathe again, to be able to devote thought to helping other people and doing good in the world, because my mind is no longer tormented. Heck, I can actually relax and watch a movie and read a fiction book now if I want to! That may sound weird to you, but it's something I couldn't do during my season of warfare!
Have you ever read the word “yolked” in the Bible? It’s not something we say anymore unless you talking about an egg, but you should look it up on google images. It’s essentially a bar that connects two oxen with a hole to put their heads through. When training a new oxen, they would always pair it with a seasoned oxen, so the seasoned one could shoulder more of the load and teach the new oxen. We may not be oxen, but let's link together on this one. I'm going to teach you everything I know about living free and victoriously in this next year. As they say, freedom isn't free. But neither is staying in defeat and bondage, so you might as well pay for freedom instead of defeat.
If this resonated with you right now, I want to tell you something that is going to sound like the exact opposite of truth, but in reality, nothing could be closer to the truth: You're so extremely blessed right now. You're blessed when prayerlessness is a luxury you can't afford. You're blessed when not reading the Word is not an option, because it's the only light you have to take the next step. You're blessed when you can't leave the house without your Bible or those 3x5 index cards with Scripture on them. It doesn't feel like it now, but when this battle is all said and done (and it will be) you'll come out a spiritual billionaire. A mighty warrior. I can testify.
The only thing that I hate more than what I went though is who I'd be if I hadn't. I have a feeling you'll be able to say the same at the end of this year.
Let's do this.